Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
