Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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