At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Damn victory sex feels great
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
