Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
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