I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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