i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.