There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I need a beard to bite.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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