You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
