Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to calm my uterus...
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize