I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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