did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
