Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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