His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize