i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
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