u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Randomize