dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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