i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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