Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
