Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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