Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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