4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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