I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
