i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
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I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
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He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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