UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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