I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
