He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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