I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
