We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
