So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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