Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
