2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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