Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I supernannyed him into submission
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
