butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I'm way too hungover for life right now
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
