something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
