i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
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But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
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Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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