I can tuck mytits in my pants
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Randomize
