i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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