he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
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I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
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After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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