I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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