i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
