is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
