There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
