Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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