Sponge bath it is.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
