Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
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Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
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Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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