he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
