with your own penis?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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