In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
