I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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