There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
