She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize